Muppets from Space, Part 3: From Bad to Worse

Oh, Muppets from Space.  You started a little shaky, but you at least had a promising premise.  But this next batch of scenes makes me so disappointed in you.  I know you're better than this.

So, Gonzo (and Rizzo) are brought before Tambor who has yet to show any signs of being villainous.  But suddenly the music gets very sinister and he pulls out an examination glove in order to test the limits of Gonzo's nose flexibility.

This is...not what I want to think about when I think of a Muppet movie.

Gonzo is still in high spirits, but when he begins to laugh at a joke Rizzo tells, Tambor (who I'll now refer to as Singer, his character's name, since he is no longer good ol' Tambor at this point) flips out and yells at him like a lunatic.  Apparently Singer has gone mad after years of being mocked for his beliefs in alien life forms.  And what's he going to do now that he has one who is in contact with a whole species?  He's going to remove his brain for experimentation.  See, even though Gonzo doesn't know anything about the people contacting him, Singer assumes he is just lying for no reason at all.

This dramatic conflict came out of nowhere and it just makes me feel uncomfortable.  No one is behaving rationally.  We've had 3 movie villains now.  Doc Hopper was ruthless, but he was still human and his goals were clear and driven by business.  Nicky Holiday was outlandish, but his spoiled brat routine was funny and kept with the parodic tone of the film.  Long John Silver was Tim Curry.  Each of these are memorable and classic.  K. Edgar Singer is none of those things.  This is not a slight on Tambor, but it's just the way he is written.  Singer doesn't know what he wants and just behaves irrationally.  Maybe if this was an intentional character choice, I could play along.  But it seems as if he is just doing evil things in order to fill the movies evil quota.  Mel Brooks' cameo in The Muppet Movie was a similar character, but he was parodying mad scientists and stayed true to himself.  Singer is just a hot mess.

As if to further emphasize how stupid this movie is fast becoming, Singer's henchman, Hollywood Hulk Hogan seizes Rizzo, gives a shout out to his fans and promotes his upcoming fights, then tosses Rizzo away because he's doing the evil thing now.

The Muppet Movie had Edgar Bergen in it.

Rizzo ends up in COVNET's rat testing facilities (which is treated like a prison so we can have a bunch of prison movie parodies).  David Arquette is the scientist who torments the rats for no reason.  That's every character's motivation in this film.  "No reason."

The Muppet Movie had Richard Pryor in it.

Meanwhile, outside COVNET, the Muppet gang attempt to break in to the facility.  First, Miss Piggy uses her Mind Mist on Ray Liotta the security guard.

Ray Liotta's okay.  He can stay.

Then, in order to get past all the armed guards, the gang uses the Invisibility Spray on themselves and...wait a minute.  Both the Mind Mist and the Invisibility Spray were used to get past guards.  Why not use the same item for both jobs?  The Invisibility Spray is a temporary substance, but there were no limits on the Mind Mist.  Just have Ray Liotta escort you through the building.  Stop making this complicated for yourselves Muppets!

But then we'd lose this neat footprint effect.

Inside, Gonzo waits in a cell and he is fed lunch by Singer's assistant, Bobo the Bear...whose name is Rentro for some reason.  The sandwich Gonzo receives begins talking to him, acting as another communication device from his alien family.  The sandwich asks for a good place to land the spaceship and Gonzo, worried that Singer will try to catch them, tells them to land at the Cape Doom lighthouse.  Bobo overhears this, but he's a nice guy and keeps it to himself for the moment.  The sandwich bids farewell and there is an uncomfortable moment between the two as Gonzo tries to eat it.

It's okay; the sandwich consents.

But before Gonzo can bite into it, doctors come to prepare him for the lobotomy.  Another Muppets Tonight alum Dr. Phil Van Neuter will be the surgeon.  I'm going to have to come back to the show in a later post, I guess.  There were just too many new characters in it.

Back with the invisible group, Fozzie uses the bathroom and washes his hands afterward, revealing his furry paws.  Professional security guard Kathy Griffin comes across this odd sight and attempts to handcuff the disembodied hands (rather than, I don't know, acting like a normal person).  Fortunately, invisible Animal chases her off, presumably to make her his unwilling bride.  Apparently, this is the best scene in the movie because it warranted an action figure.

Ah, something to place next to "Usher Scooter" and "Resort Smithers."

Tomorrow, Gonzo nearly loses his brain, making him the most rational character in the film.

Muppet Classic Theater, Part 3: Silly Stories

5) The Emperor's New Clothes

The Original Story:

An arrogant emperor hires some tailors who are actually swindlers.  They take advantage of the emperor's pride and convince him that they have crafted clothes out of a fabric that is invisible to those who are too unworthy, elegant, and intelligent.  The emperor naturally cannot see the clothes, but he doesn't want to appear unfit for the crown so he pretends that he can see the clothes.  His royal staff also claim to see the clothes, so that they appear worthy of their regal positions.  When he goes through town to show off his fine new clothes, a little boy states the obvious that the emperor is naked and the emperor carries on, although deep inside, he realizes that he's been hoodwinked.

The Muppet Twist:

The story plays the same note for note, with Fozzie as the emperor and Rizzo as the swindler, although there is an added message of not following along with everyone else in an attempt to appear "cool."

Also, the emperor is clearly wearing underwear.

But there is a subtle difference that once again ignores the original message, probably to make room for the new one.  It has to do with Robin playing the little boy.

How Does the Twist Affect the Original?

Well, we all know that Robin is very mature for his age.  As such, his character is celebrated as being one of the most intelligent children in the land.  Which is fine and all except in the original, the boy wasn't supposed to be wise.  He was just supposed to be normal.  It was his innocence that made him speak the truth.

Robin's too smart to play this role.  Bring back Andy and Randy Pig.

Because everyone recognizes Robin's smarts, the emperor's shame is quickly covered up and a big deal is made out of the situation (with Rizzo and his partners ending up in prison).  The original at least sticks to the whole pride angle, where the emperor's ego can't suffer any embarrassment, so he keeps his reaction bottled up and continues his parade through the town, grimacing all the while.  But by casting Fozzie (who wears his emotions on his sleeve), the emperor must be frightfully silly and imbecile.  It's not that he is arrogant, he just is surrounded by too many yes-men.

And he has too many beauty marks.

Rating:  Once again, the message is changed and once again, it's a step in the wrong direction (and it makes an already ludicrous story even crazier).  2/5

(A final thought on this story: Emperor Fozzie tries to make "Pop-pop-pop" a catchphrase.  He was years ahead of his time.)

6) The Elves and the Shoemaker

The Original Story:

A poor but kindly shoemaker is struggling to make ends meet.  Although his business is suffering due to lack of materials, he still shares his meager food and earnings with those less fortunate than him.  One night, when he has only one scrap of leather left, a group of elves secretly come in and make the most amazing pair of shoes.  It sells for a lot of money the next day and the shoemaker, after buying more materials, gives the rest to the poor.  The elves return and make more shoes as a reward.  With the shoemaker's business now booming, he works late into the night to meet demand.  There, he encounters the elves, returning for work.  To thank them, he makes them special outfits and they leave, never to be seen again.

Just like in Harry Potter!

The Muppet Twist:

Instead of elves, they are Elvises.

Thank you very much.

How Does the Twist Affect the Story?

This is what I've been waiting for.  This is what the Muppets are best at.  They take two familiar premises and mash them together and present the results.  Nearly every song/sketch on The Muppet Show had to do with the incongruity of two elements, often inspired by a pun.  They took pigs and made them vikings singing "In the Navy" by the Village People.  They took pigs and made them eskimos singing "Lullaby of Broadway."  They took pigs and made them the stars of a Star Trek-esque series.  They did a lot with pigs.

But nevertheless, "The Elvises and the Shoemaker" seems just like one of the old bits.  And the pairing works, because, of course, the Elvises get to work making blue suede shoes.

What else would they be doing?

And at the end, the outfits that the shoemaker presents to the Elvises are their rhinestone jumpsuits.

It all makes perfect sense.

I'm willing to forgive this story for dropping the charitable aspect of the shoemaker's character because we need to spend as much time as possible with these Elvises.  These bizarre creatures that don't seem entirely aware of the world around them and only act like Elvis out of a sense of duty (much like the original shoemaking elves, who are obligated to make shoes for some unknown reason).

Rating:  Easily the best of the bunch.  It's a hunka burnin' love.  5/5

So, Muppet Classic Theater.  It's certainly a joyful, non-threatening little treat.  And it played a large role in keeping the Muppets on people's minds during the hiatus between feature films.  If you grew up with it, I'm sure you have a favorite story and fond memories of this little endeavor.

For me, the stories from best to worst are:

1) The Elves and the Shoemaker

2) Rumpelstiltskin

3) King Midas

4) The Three Little Pigs

5) The Emperor's New Clothes

6) The Boy Who Cried Wolf

But really, my only qualms are where the stories deviate from the original.  Those that do it with a clever purpose fare better than those that just shoehorn in new morals for today's kids.

It's worth checking it out if you need a quick Muppet fix (and if you're a fan of Gonzo and Rizzo's relationship).  Otherwise, just stick with some old episodes of The Muppet Show because it has a lot more pigs in it.

Muppet Classic Theater, Part 1: Twisted Tales

The Muppets of the '90s continued their quest to remain in the public eye with a callback of sorts to the original Muppet specials.  Since Henson gained a lot of popularity through his fairy tale adaptations, it was time for the Muppets to return to the well of traditional stories.  Sure, Sesame Street had been dealing with these fables for years, but no one was complaining.  What spawned was a direct-to-video feature called Muppet Classic Theater.  Six short stories were acted out on a "stage" with our main Muppets playing the roles and Gonzo and Rizzo alternately narrating.  It wasn't quite as long as the previous films and the production quality isn't even up to Muppet Show standards, so I hesitate to call it a canonical "Muppet movie."

Marvel at the direct-to-video splendor!

But this video played a major role in defining the Muppet aesthetic for the decade and it would even introduce some characters who would appear in later projects with more substantial roles.  So let's look at the tales.

1) The Three Little Pigs

The Original Story:

Three pigs build their own houses to protect themselves from the Big Bad Wolf.  The youngest pigs build a house of straw and a house of sticks while the eldest and smartest pig builds one of bricks.  The wolf is able to blow down the houses of the first two pigs, but is unable to destroy the brick house.  He decides to come down through the chimney where the pigs wait with a pot of boiling water.

The Muppet Twist:

Miss Piggy plays the eldest pig, Sandy, to her dimwitted brothers Andy and Randy.  Both them and her father don't expect her to be intelligent or crafty because she is just a girl.

Oh, and the wolf is taken out by a rocket.

How Does the Twist Affect the Original?

The story is no longer about being practical and prepared and instead emphasizes that girls are just as capable as boys.  Piggy/Sandy even sings a whole song about how she deserves respect, although, coming out of diva Piggy's mouth, the whole number is very self-serving.  But at least her heart is in the right place.

It's hard to be a positive role-model for young girls when you exhibit caustic behavior 90% of the time.

The rest of the story is as straightforward as a Muppet adaptation can be, with slapstick, jokes, meta-references to the original text, and (implied) explosions.

"I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow myself to smithereens."

The characters of Andy and Randy Pig first appear here and their numbskullery must have been popular.  They repeatedly headbutt each other, making them dumber and dumber, which is interesting because the Muppets never really had such moronic characters before.  We'll address them more later when they become semi-permanent additions to the Muppet cast.

At least they are smart enough to run away from predators.

Rating:  This whole story goes exactly as one would expect, and even with the intended positive moral and amusing characters, it doesn't have much substance to it.  3/5

2) King Midas

The Original Story:

King Midas finds a satyr passed out drunk in his garden and takes him in, treating him well.  As a reward for his kindness, the god of wine Dionysus grants him a wish and Midas wishes that anything he touches will turn to gold.  The wish is granted and soon Midas enjoys all of his new riches.  But he quickly discovers this blessing is a curse as he can no longer touch food to eat.  Even worse, he accidentally touches his daughter, turning her to solid gold.  He asks to reverse the wish and he is told to wash his gift away in the Pactolus River, where the sand slowly turns to gold.

The Muppet Twist:

King Midas (Kermit) only wants peace in the world but his wife (Piggy) interrupts him and requests the golden touch power.  Also, Midas accidentally turns HIMSELF into gold, leading Piggy to give up all her new riches in order to save her husband.

WHOOPS!!!

How Does the Twist Affect the Original?

Once again, Piggy is the main focus of the story.  And since Kermit wouldn't be the greedy type, she has to be the one to even make such a claim.  Although, in the original, Midas wasn't particularly greedy.  He just thought that would be a good way to become richer.  Even Kermit uses this power for good, by helping the people of his kingdom by providing them with golden items.  But, that moral isn't as clear cut as "don't be greedy" so Piggy has to stand in for the tragic role.

I do like the costume design choice that all of Piggy's clothes are now golden as well.

Also, there is a bizarre twist with the satyr character.  Gonzo plays the satyr and he is also the one to grant the wish, removing Dionysus's part of the story.  As a result, there has to be a reason he gives Midas the opportunity for any wish he desires.  So, after he is discovered sleeping in the garden, Midas, instead of taking him in and offering him hospitality, threatens to execute him for damaging the flowers.  Why is Kermit getting so murder-happy in all of these story adaptations?  He claims that he doesn't agree with that law but HE'S THE KING AND HE CAN JUST REMOVE THAT RULING!

You picked the wrong place to nap.

At the end, he gives Midas one more chance for another wish and once again Piggy blurts in (despite having just learned a valuable lesson) and asks for a juicer.  That's...pretty funny.

Rating:  The twists are creative and in keeping with the Muppet characters, so although the story isn't improved, it is still a solid funny version.  Although, one thing kept bugging me.  The back curtain that the set is painted on keeps getting bumped into by the Muppets and rippling, creating a warped, trippy effect that makes it hard to physically watch at times.  4/5

Tomorrow, we have another story with wolves and another story with weird wish-granting creatures played by Gonzo.

Muppet Treasure Island, Part 3: A Mutiny on the High Seas

Smollett orders Jim to turn the treasure map over to him so that he may lock it up in his safe.  And there it stays for weeks.  The weeks become months, and very soon, the entire crew succumbs to "Cabin Fever," one of the more inspired musical numbers of the film.

It wouldn't be a Muppet movie without an over-the-top musical production!

After getting that out of their system, the locked up pirates complain about their conditions and Silver puts on a show, reprimanding them for their misdeeds.  He talks with Hawkins who ultimately slips up, revealing that there is a treasure map on board and in the cabin of Smollett.  That night, Silver strikes up a conversation with Arrow.  Remember all that stuff about alcohol earlier?  Well, this is the part in the book where Silver gets Arrow drunk so that he falls overboard.  But, since we can't have that, Silver instead appeals to Arrow's authority and convinces him to check the lifeboats for safety reasons.  Arrow gives him his hat and keys to hold on to while performing his safety check and drifts away into the endless expanse of ocean.

Bye Sam!  I'll miss you!

The next morning, the crew mourns the passing of Arrow, and Silver breaks his companions free, allowing them to steal the map.  In the kitchen, Gonzo, Rizzo, and Jim sneak some apples from the apple barrel and overhear Silver and his men planning a mutiny, intending to take over the ship once the treasure has been found.

They'll get to the CORE of this problem!

As the ship nears the island, Jim informs Smollett of the pirates' plan.  Smollett decides to let the pirate crew disembark on the island first with the map and then abandon them for a year so that they can return for the treasure when the pirates are too weak (or too dead) to fight back.  That's..very dark.  I know Kermit is playing an established character, but yeesh!

Kermit the Frog: Letting 30 men starve to death to teach them a lesson.

Unfortunately, Silver expects something is up when Smollett lets the pirates go first, so he kidnaps Hawkins to ensure his safety.  They reach the island and decide it's time to come clean.  Yes, he is actually a pirate, one of the original members of the crew that buried the treasure.

Methinks the outfit gave it away.

Silver tries to convince Hawkins to truly embrace the adventurous lifestyle and just become a pirate.  And, in order to convince him, we get another song, "Professional Pirate," which is sadly Curry's only number.

Hawkins refuses the offer, claiming that Smollett will surely rescue him.  Sounds of cannonfire signal Smollett's arrival, but Silver assures him that it is actually the signal that the remaining pirates on the ship have actually mutinied and he is now in charge.

But don't worry, Smollett, Gonzo, and Rizzo managed to take the other lifeboat and are headed to the island right now!

Now, I know what you're thinking: "This is a Muppet movie.  Where are all the pigs?"  We shall find out tomorrow!  The pigs are coming!

Muppet Treasure Island, Part 1: A Call to Adventure

After the success of The Muppet Christmas Carol, Walt Disney Pictures produced another adaptation of a classic piece of British literature with the Muppets playing minor roles.  Production wise, this film would be exactly the same as it's predecessor.  Yet, despite (or because of) the similarities, the next film would be even more successful than the last three Muppet films.

This one's about pirates.

Treasure Island, like A Christmas Carol has been through dozens of film adaptations.  While the story may not be as memorable as the Dickens tale, Robert Louis Stevenson's novel established many iconic characters and elements that we associate with pirate tales.  Buried treasure, "X marks the spot," island paradises and eye-patch-wearing, peg-legged, parrot-totting pirates can all be found in this epic narrative.  Muppet Treasure Island is aware of this, and so it begins with a shanty called, "Shiver Me Timbers" glorifying the pirate life as the titular treasure is being buried.

But the focus of the novel is the young Jim Hawkins, who heads off on an adventure, leaving his life of squalor and poverty behind.  He is introduced working in an inn alongside Gonzo and Rizzo, who a basically fulfilling the same roles as they did in The Muppet Christmas Carol.  They are just being themselves, commenting on the situations they find themselves in.  But hey, that was one of the best parts of the previous movie, and they continue to be funny here, so who's complaining?

Billy Connolly is, apparently.

That's Billy Bones, one of the inn's permanent residents who amuses other patrons with his fanciful tales of life on the high seas.  Everyone considers him to be a crazy coot, and no one takes him seriously, except for Jim.  Having lost his father, who was also a seafarer, Jim dreams of having his own adventures on the ocean, and, with his girly voice, he and his pals sing of "Something Better."

After closing up the inn for the night, a late visitor comes barging in, demanding to see Billy Bones.  This is Blind Pew, an intimidating figure in the original book who is now a Muppet buffoon.  Still, he manages to be humorous and creepy at the same time.  I'm not sure why they didn't have Uncle Deadly play this role since they look extremely similar and are both portrayed by Jerry Nelson.  A missed opportunity, I say.

Maybe he's his long-lost twin?

Anyway, Blind Pew was a former member of Billy Bones' pirate crew, and he has come to deliver a sinister message: the Black Spot.

The simple spot signifies that the rest of the pirates are going to hunt Billy down if he doesn't turn over the treasure map he kept to himself all these years.  Bones instantly dies of fright, but then wakes up a bit to explain some of the situation and give Jim the map, only to die again (obviously this is different in the book, but, hey, it's a funny kids movie, let it go).

The pirates raid the inn and Jim narrowly escapes as the building burns down.  He decides that this is his chance to go on an adventure (since he has nothing to go back to) and heads into town to find someone willing to finance his voyage.  He ends up at the house of the rich Squire Trelawney who in the novel is completely normal and interested in the history of the map and it's treasure.  Here, it's Fozzie Bear and he talks to a man who lives in his finger named "Mr. Bimbo."

REDRUM!

This was Jerry Juhl's decision to add this trait, and initially, Frank Oz was turned off to the idea, since it didn't make sense for either Trelawney or Fozzie to exhibit this level of lunacy.  Yet, Frank grew to love this aspect.  And you know what?  It actually works for the movie.  It adds a whole new level to Fozzie's psyche and it's pretty interesting to see this play out.

Along with his companion Dr. Livesy (played by Bunsen) and Beaker (played by Beaker), Trelawney agrees to lend Hawkins his ship, and he arranges a crew to set sail on the Hispaniola.  And it is the most magnificent thing young Hawkins has ever seen.

 This movie is going to be EPIC.

Tomorrow, we meet the crew of the Hispaniola and learn why every move needs Tim Curry/Sam the Eagle.

The Muppets Take Manhattan, Part 2: Drifting Aimlessly

It is time for the Muppets to split up with "Saying Goodbye."  "Together Again" was a delightful romp, but this is the first song of the movie that captures a feeling in that Muppety way, making for an emotional number.

Piggy leaves by train, others by bus, and pretty soon, the gang has scattered to the wind, unsure of whether they will ever see each other again.  Many graduates have gone through this scenario, spending years of their lives bonding with an inseparable group and then finding that there comes a day where life steps in and rips them apart.

And they just become faint memories.

Kermit, always the dreamer, stays behind and wanders around the overwhelming city.  During a powerful, introspective moment, he travels to the top of the Empire State Building at night and yells at the monstrous city, resolving that he will not be beaten.  It's genuine and riveting.

This is just a regular picture of New York at night, but this it's still breathtaking.

Then we cut to the street below where we see Piggy hearing Kermit's oath and this is where the movie begins to fall apart for a while.

Kermit returns to Pete's Luncheonette to get a job, just as Rizzo is demanding a bigger staff since he is overworked.  You would think that Kermit would be hired as simple as that, but no, Rizzo has to round up a bunch of one-dimensional rat friends to work at the restaurant first.  Pete is not pleased about the idea but he eventually relents and lets that rats work there.

"Rats is rats."

Now you may be thinking, "Oh no, Kermit will have to find a job elsewhere!" But Jenny convinces Pete to hire Kermit as a dishwasher anyway.  So, what was the point of all the rats?  We'll get to that later.  Right now, Kermit has to plan how to get his show produced and his first step is to use Jenny's costuming talents to disguise him as a fast-talking agent so he can sneak his way into a production company and get his script to the higher ups.  And the scene is just ridiculous.

Kermit + An Afro = All Sorts of Wrong.

After saying "Boffo" a million times, Kermit leaves and the producer tosses the script right in the trash. So, all of that work for nothing, which is true to life but it's still kind of weird for the movie to focus so much on this scene for it to have absolutely no payoff.

Kermit meets with Jenny in a park to discuss the next step of his plan, and a disguised Piggy watches them grow close from afar, getting insanely jealous.  Her subplot doesn't make much sense either since she has no reason to hide and stalk Kermit.  If she was going to stay in New York, she should have just told Kermit.  If she is not communicating with him at all, then why get upset when another girl swoops in on the single frog?  You're just making things worse for yourself Piggy!

And speaking of Piggy making things worse for herself, her stalking has made her late for her new job with Joan Rivers at a perfume counter.  While angry Piggy does get some funny lines, yelling about how the perfume isn't going to change stupid men at all, the scene is another "things just happen with no effect on the plot" moment.  Joan Rivers, in order to cheer Piggy up starts playfully giving her a makeover with all of the makeup.  They have fun, and the scene as a very improvisational vibe as the two make a mess and laugh themselves silly.  Then Piggy gets fired and another scene is over.

One more cameo down.

Back at Pete's Luncheonette, the customers have been complaining about the rodent waitstaff, so Pete has redistributed them all to the kitchen.  What follows next is a condensed version of Pixar's 2007 classic Ratatouille.

Technologically speaking, this scene is a marvel, seeing all of the rats preparing food in unique ways without the aid of strings.  Jim Henson was very proud of this scene, and he helped stage a lot of it.  What's most amazing was that real butter and pancake batter was used since it provided the best consistency (even when the rat was using butter pads for skating).

I could tell you how they got that one rat to ride an eggbeater like a unicycle, but the magic is better.

It's been 15 minutes and barely nothing has happened to continue the story and that's when Kermit receives a bunch of postcards so we can see what the other Muppet have been doing with their time.  So, we will be taking a break in the action during this extended break in the action.  Okay.  I understand that sometimes in life, nothing happens for long stretches of time, but it seems like they are just stalling at this point.

Tomorrow, more Muppety vignettes and then finally, we'll get back to the story.

The Muppets Take Manhattan, Part 1: Welcome to the Real World

1981 saw the premiere of The Great Muppet Caper and the final season of The Muppet Show.  After that, the Muppets practically disappeared for a while.  With Sesame Street, The Dark Crystal, and a new show called Fraggle Rock taking up most of Henson's time, the Muppets found themselves with very little to do.  Finally, in 1984, after an absence of two years, the Muppets returned for one more feature film.  And this time, they were headed to the Big Apple!

Start spreading the news!

Ever since 1970, Henson knew that he wanted to bring the Muppets to Broadway.  The idea of doing a giant, musical, live performance with the Muppets had great appeal to Henson and in 1972 he proposed a show called The Muppets at Lincoln Center.  Since this was pre-Muppet Show, it would have manly consisted of a series of skits with a variety of original puppets.  Although it was approved, television became too demanding.  But, as Jerry Juhl noted, "Every couple of years, when Jim would take a week off, he would come in and say, 'We gotta do that Broadway show.'"  Based on that dream, The Muppets Take Manhattan was born.

The gang is back!

The film opens similar to The Muppet Movie, featuring Kermit singing the opening song, "Together Again."  For audiences at the time, a two-year break from the Muppets was too long, so this song was a way of reuniting the gang and welcoming the audience back into the world of the Muppets.

Each Muppet movie has it's own sort of canon, so here, we soon discover that while the Muppets are as we remember them, The Muppet Show and previous Muppet movies never happened.  Kermit and his friends (Piggy, Gonzo, Scooter, Fozzie, Rowlf, Camilla, and the Electric Mayhem) are graduating college students from the fictional Danhurst College.  They are all into theater and have been performing a show penned by Kermit known as "Manhattan Melodies."  For some reason, this musical revue just drives the entire campus wild and this prompts the gang to consider taking the show to Broadway after they graduate.  Kermit his hesitant at first but decides it's worth it to follow his dream.

The gang immediately travels to New York and shack up in the cheapest living space available, since Kermit naively assures them they will be living large on Broadway the very next day.

Affordable Manhattan housing

The group meets with a producer named Martin Price.  This is scene is a great moment of fantastical Muppet optimism clashing with the harsh realities of life and showbiz.  Kermit describes his show as being about true life in New York City, which he thinks will be full of songs, dancing, and laughter, but the producer assumes he means gritty crimes and murders.  Nonetheless, he bewilderingly finds their show to be a great idea, despite a virtually unknown cast and a lack of shootings.  He agrees to produce their show as long as they fund him $300 each.  That's when it's revealed that Price is actually a con artist who takes money from naive dreamers such as the Muppets.  The police arrest him, with the assistance of a wild Animal.

He's so nimble!

That's when the Muppets realize that their success isn't going to happen overnight.  The spend their entire summer traveling from producer to producer, with no hits.  But, they've got to keep their chin up, since they can't take no for an answer.

Reality bites.

After a few months, Scooter notes that their resources have dwindled and they can only afford to spend two more nights in the city.  The group asks Kermit what they should do next and he cracks, tired of always having to be the leader.  It was foolish of them to go to New York in the first place.  Overwhelmed, the group stops to rest at the nearby Pete's Luncheonette.  As Kermit waits by the counter, Rizzo the Rat appears to take the groups order.  Since Steve Whitmire joined the Muppeteer gang towards the end of The Muppet Show, his then-current signature character Rizzo was given an oddly large role in the film.

Fozzie should probably wash his hands before he eats.

At the counter, Kermit express his woes to the owner Pete, who gives him the sagely advice, "Peoples is peoples."

Since that doesn't help, Kermit then turns to Pete's daughter Jenny, who agrees help Kermit out, since she too has dreams of making it big in New York.

And Kermit would look adorable in that waitress outfit.

Meanwhile, the other Muppets discuss calling it quits on the whole thing, especially since they've been relying on Kermit too much.  They tell Kermit that they have had other job offers and that it's best they part ways.

It's only the beginning and already the Muppets have given up on their dreams!  We are in for a new kind of Muppet movie.

Tomorrow, everyone goes on their own journeys, and Kermit takes on the Big Apple alone.

The Muppet Christmas Carol, Part 1: Bah, Humbug!

Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol is rightfully considered a classic due to the impact it had on our modern day perception of Christmas.  Published in 1843, this novella was the first story to focus on the festive spirit and secular traditions that surrounded the holiday season, rather than the religious and pagan history from which it was born.  The concepts of family togetherness, celebration, and generosity were brought to the forefront in the story, forever linking them in the public's minds with Christmas.

Drink and be merry!

Because of its influence, the story has been retold countless times through various media, with over 50 interpretations presented on television or in film.  Each version adheres to the same basic plot structure following one person's journey through the past, present, and future to rediscover the true meaning of Christmas.  With so many adaptations to choose from, some are bound to be over better quality than others.

Many people cite The Muppet Christmas Carol as being not only their favorite Muppet movie, but as being their favorite interpretation of A Christmas Carol as well.  I am not among those people.  As its own movie, I think it is fine.  But as a Muppet movie, I do not consider it the best and as A Christmas Carol, I find it to be severely lacking in quality.  I believe most supporters of this movie are clouded in their own sense of nostalgia, only remembering having enjoyed this movie as a young child.

But perhaps I am being unfair.  Everyone I encounter loves this film with all of their heart.  Perhaps I am just missing something.  I shall watch this film again, to see if it truly does hold up as more than just a kids' movie.  So, here we go.  This week, it's The Muppet Christmas Carol.

There are two rats on the poster.  We're in for a treat!

First, a little history.  This was the first Muppet movie to be made following the deaths of two very influential Muppet performers, Richard Hunt and Jim Henson.  As such, their more memorable characters were pushed to the background or removed entirely from the project (Scooter, in particular is completely absent).  This was also the first film to be produced under the Walt Disney Studios name, which results in a more streamlined production differing in tone from the original three films.  The movie was originally intended to be made for TV until Disney expanded the budget.  However, these changes will not influence my review in anyway.  Although Henson and Hunt are missed, their spirit lives on in the remaining puppeteers and Jim's son Brian, who directs the film.  It is still very much a Muppet group effort, even if it must suffer the burden of being made during this unexpected transitional period.

The film opens on a busy 19th-century London street in the wintertime as Muppets and humans coexist without tripping over one another.  Puppet-recycling is in full effect as many minor characters from past productions appear in Victorian garb.  As merchants hock their wares on the street, we settle on a booth manned by the Great Gonzo and Rizzo the Rat.

Charles Dickens and friend

In the original script, Muppets were supposed to play all of the major characters, including the three Ghosts of Christmas.  Piggy would be Past, Scooter would be Present, and Gonzo as Future.  However, as it underwent revision, it was decided that the Ghosts should be more foreboding in order for Scrooge and the audience to take them seriously.  Also, a voice-over narration had been considered in order to keep Dickens' masterful language intact.  But when Gonzo got booted from the ghost role, it was decided to place him as the role of the narrator.  Rizzo had recently joined the ranks as a main Muppet character and his performer Steve Whitmire had a great repertoire with Gonzo's Dave Golez.  With Gonzo as Dickens and Rizzo on deck to provide commentary and comic relief, the comedic duo were allowed to lead the audience through the movie.

This choice is one of the movie's great assets.  Most versions try to keep the narration either through another character, as a voice-over, or (in the most clumsily fashion I've ever seen) incorporated into the dialogue.  But Gonzo presents a liveliness to the narrator that is not present in any other version and, more importantly, he cares about the story.  While Rizzo often gets side-tracked with his jokes, Gonzo is always there to keep everyone focused on the story at hand.  As I mentioned in an earlier post, the erratic Gonzo is capable of deep pathos, making him the perfect choice to play Dickens.

Dickens begins his tale, introducing Ebenezer Scrooge by way of the film's first musical number.  This catchy song is cute, but I feel it fails to fully characterize Scrooge.  It falls into the common trap of telling rather than showing.

Our Scrooge (Michael Caine) calmly strolls through the singing puppets, ignoring them all the way.  Despite their claims of his many faults, we are not treated to any of them during the song.  For comparison, I implore you to check out the 1970 musical Scrooge starring Albert Finney.  During his introduction song "Father Christmas," we witness him going about town calling upon his many debtors, showing little compassion to their plights.  He is outright mean to everybody he encounters and shows no remorse at all.  Caine, on the other hand, while a great actor, does not display any signs of cruelty yet, despite what the lyrics imply.

In fact, he often seems as if he would rather be anywhere else.

Perhaps this is meant to show how disinterested he is in the lower class, but it just comes off as boredom.  This continues as he enters his office and casually tosses out a random Muppet asking for an extension in his mortgage payment.  Drawing on another comparison, Alastair Sim's famous portrayal in 1951's A Christmas Carol took his disinterest in the common man to a whole new level.  It seemed as if life had beaten him down so much that there was nothing left for him but resentment.  He showed no compassion to anyone because he was physically incapable of finding those emotions.  The human race became foreign to him and their joy at Christmas irritated him because he was unfamiliar with it.

Caine, however, plays Scrooge as a jerk who just enjoys being a jerk.  When he sends Bob Cratchit to prepare the many eviction notices due on Christmas, he seems to exhibit a villainous glee at the prospect of people losing their homes.  Scrooge may be cold-hearted and unsympathetic, but evil?  That's pushing the character a little too far.  Scrooge's main fault is that he is self-absorbed, not malicious.

Money for the poor?  I'd rather watch them starve to death while I stroke my cat.

Kermit as Bob Cratchit, like Gonzo as Dickens, is another inspired Muppet casting choice.  Kermit's humility is almost identical to Cratchit's meek yet optimistic persona.  One welcome addition to the original dialogue is when Cratchit tries to ask for Christmas day off from work.  Usually, Scrooge reluctantly gives in to the custom, decrying it, but acknowledging it nonetheless.  Here, he puts up some resistance, prompting Cratchit to appeal to his thriftiness by logically explaining he would lose more money by staying open on a day when all other businesses are closed.  That's very clever and bold for the usually subservient Cratchit.

But why he has to be surrounded by a gaggle of unnecessary rat co-workers is beyond me.

I shall conclude today's post with Kermit/Cratchit's pleasant song "One More Sleep 'Til Christmas."  Like with "Scrooge," I find that the visuals and the lyrics do not exactly match up, as the rat bookkeepers exhibit many playful slapstick as they pack up shop while Kermit sings a low-key tune.  This is one of those moments that distracts the viewer as the story is placed on hold to allow for puppet antics.

The end of the song with the shooting star presents a nice contrast as the camera pans over to a homeless Bean Bunny, struggling to keep warm in the trash.  What is a beautiful Christmas Eve night for one person is a source of extreme discomfort for another.  Despite being a background character, Bean has managed to steal the show with the most heart-wrenching scene in the film.

I hope the rest of the movie is as meaningful as this five-second moment.