Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Men are Weirdos and Women are Chickens

From his very first appearance, it was evident that Gonzo was unique.  Whatever his species is, he was the only one of his kind.  But he was a man.  And a man has needs.  He sought companionship and, since he himself was unclear as to what he was, he was not picky about the species of the female.  This first became evident when puppeteer Dave Golez decided to ad lib a line during a scene involving dancing chickens.  As the performers left the stage, Gonzo noticed that one had "nice legs."

I'd like to taste her eleven herbs and spices....

A flame awakened inside Gonzo's heart.  And his passion grew for barnyard animals.  A couple episodes later, a cow mysteriously appeared backstage at the Muppet Theater.  Gonzo fell head over heels for it and tried to arrange a date.

She was udderly beautiful.

But, being a regular cow and not a Muppet cow, the bovine creature had no idea what was going on and did not return the blue weirdo's advances.  Heartbroken and lost, Gonzo began to wonder if anyone would ever love him.  And that's when he met her.


Her name was Camilla, and she was the most beautiful chicken he had ever laid eyes on.  He started planning his courtship so as to woo her properly.  However, being a guy, he often had difficulty focusing his attention on just one girl.  He began to find all chickens as attractive as Camilla, because, well, they all looked exactly alike!  Henson joked that Gonzo often just assumed that whichever chicken was closest to him at the time was Camilla.

Camilla is in there somewhere.

And again, being a guy, he had trouble hiding his lust for other prospects, even when trying to win over Camilla's heart.  In the middle of singing a song he composed specifically for his chicken love, he became distracted by the presence of another curvaceous fowl.


Big Bird always seems to get into trouble during these Muppet crossovers.

Fortunately, Gonzo eventually got his act together and became a loving and devoted boyfriend.  Though, this shouldn't really come as much of a surprise.  While it took him a while to settle into a committed relationship, it was clear from an early age that he was going to turn out to be a wonderful partner.

When people describe "soulmates," they imply that two people are destined to belong together.  All of their lives are leading up to the moment when they meet, and they shall stay together for the rest of their lives.  By looking into Gonzo's past, we can see that he always loved Camilla, before he even knew she existed.

In fact, Camilla was not even born yet.

In the Muppet Babies episode, "Faster Than a Speeding Weirdo" (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3), Baby Gonzo carries his stuffed chicken around with him everywhere.  And if there is one thing we know about Gonzo, it's that he loves to live dangerously.  So, after a spectacular kiddie car crash, the toy Camilla gets badly damaged and has to be taken away from him.  In a rare move, the normally light-hearted cartoon show becomes a heart-breaking tale about love and loss.  Gonzo becomes instantly regretful of his foolish ways, and prays for a miracle that his beloved Camilla will survive.


As the Toy Story films have taught us, the bond between a child and his favorite toy is unlike any other.  Despite being inanimate, the child puts his imagination and soul into the object to bring it to life.  A piece of him is forever linked with it, and a lot of weight rests on its well-being.  Since we know that the toy Camilla is just a proxy for Gonzo's future sweetheart, this loss is even more unbearable.

Baby Gonzo often flirted with Baby Piggy, but she never took him seriously.  He had to retreat to his fictionalized girlfriend in order to cope with the loneliness.  It's as if he knew that one day, he would meet the actual Camilla.  The faith that his soulmate was out there waiting for him gave him the strength to keep on going.  Through some sort of voodoo magic, losing the toy meant losing the girl.

Luckily for Gonzo, he did grow up and he did meet the woman who would change his world forever.

She's a bit hard to read, but I think he loves him too.

As one of the only confirmed relationships in the Muppet franchise, Gonzo and Camilla's courtship represents the greatest idea that love has to offer.

Love doesn't have to make sense.  Guys can be complete weirdos, acting like foolish idiots, trying to understand how the world works, and constantly shooting themselves in the foot.  Or out of a cannon.  And women can be chickens, afraid to try something new, something unexpected, something dangerous.  They can fear the uncertainties of a new romance.  We all can.  It's what makes us human.

But every so often, a weirdo and a chicken will come together because it just feels right.

If they can find love, anyone can.

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